If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
is wine microwaveable?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
