There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
