Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
My breath smells like gin and sadness
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
