Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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