How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
