Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize