i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
