SEEEEXXX PLEASE
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
