OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
