This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Someone shattered a urinal.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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