We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
sex in a hospital.. check
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
