Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
