If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
