why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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