she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
