what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
