i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize