If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize