nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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