Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
either way he was missing a nipple.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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