I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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