I must be too annoying 4 u.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
