the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
