I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
