Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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