I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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