I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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