my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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