You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
