Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I deserve this hangover.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
