Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Randomize