i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
