What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
