is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize