He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
