She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize