my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
