So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I have grass duct taped all over my body
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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