do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
This is classic penis vs brain.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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