i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
