Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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