why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
