you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
