We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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