he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
