...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Randomize