Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
