new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Slut skills are useful in every country.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
