You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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