i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
