shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
